Tuesday, 24 May 2011

Au Revoir...

All photos copyright Mel, leave 'em alone

You know it's just so easy to blame the French for...well, everything, isn't it?

The strikes, messing up the IMF (oh Dominique I hope you're going down) and probably the ash cloud as well.

But I'm being flippant because actually, I love the French.  Hold on, I'll qualify that, I love some dear lovely French friends and I love, LOVE the language.

Aged 8 I asked the teacher to set me French homework because I was desperate to learn.  I have fond memories of the simple book she gave me to work from, with pictures of a chat sur la table.  I love how the language works, how they use ridiculously flowery phrases and how I'm always enchanted when I learn something new; who knew that 'un souffre-douleur' meant a whipping boy? (learnt that one last week).

I love that I can communicate in French and that my accent sounds Swedish.  Who wouldn't want to be asked 'Where is your accent from, are you Swedish?'  I instantly grow about 12 inches, my hair looks blonder and I strike a pose that suggests 'yes I go topless on the beach because I have fabulously pert tits.' (btw, I would love to be Swedish, but that's a whole other story).

no more strolling on the Champs Elysees...

So, getting to the point...I'm leaving. 

Whoosh!  See how that French carpet was pulled from under our feet!  Bang! Crash!  See how our Parisian life is falling down around our ears as we prepare to move back to the UK in a hurry!

Am I crying?  At least twice a day.  Am I waking up in the night thinking 'fuckity fuck who is going to organise this move back to England'?  Yes I am.  (And I think it's me that's supposed to organise that move, hmmm.)

Am I hoping against hope they said the wrong country and REALLY they meant Singapore?  Oh so much.

Mais non.

So in a matter of weeks (shit! in WEEKS!) I'll be doing the school run in England, wearing shades to hide my tears and doing that 'Oh hello, yes, we are new!' thing with a bright, plastic smile.  And then I will crawl home - wherever home may be, because having a house would be good, wouldn't it? - and I think I will probably eat biscuits and cry some more.

And swear.  Swearing is helping at the moment.

So, business suspended here at Pig in the Kitchen, but who knows when I'll think SOD IT! and bake you a gluten free tea bread instead.

A bientot mes amis.

© Pig in the Kitchen All Rights Reserved


Anonymous said...

Don't leave us for too long, you've got me through so many crises, last one being my daughters newly found wheat allergy, you know au revoir means you'll be back, see you soon x !

Jill Colonna said...

Sod it, you've got me in tears now, too! I can't believe it? What? I saw au revoir on FB and thought, NON, pas possible...Mel??
BTW, even when you've got all of this going on just now, your writing is just as fabulous as ever. Why is it when you're feeling down you make us laugh? Good luck on the move and the preparations. Thinking of you - and you know the door is always open if you feel like popping in for a cuppa or something stronger ;-)

Pig in the Kitchen said...

Anonymous, I won't, I promise (fingers only loosely crossed). I'm so pleased the blog is helpful!

Jill, gah! how can this be happening?! Gutted, of course. Thank-you for the sweet words about my writing and if the patisserie model thing comes off, call me, I'll be straight back to eat mille feuille!!xx

I'm So Fancy said...

Welcome! Welcome!!!!

Potty Mummy said...

Oh! Not sure what to say... Other than let's get drunk in a few weekends time? Thinking of you in the move... x (And does this mean chartreuse fur-lined bras are to be a thing of the past now that you won't be living in the lingerie fashion capital of the world?)

Mya said...

The only way to get through this kind of crisis is to swear a lot (which I'm pleased to see you are already doing - just love fuckity fuck!) eat tons of illicit food in the name of 'comfort' and blackmail whoever is responsible for your family's upheaval with unreasonable and very expensive demands... That's what I'd do anyway. Courage!
Mya x

Iota said...

Oh!! Oh oh oh!! Don't know what to say.

Pig. You can't stop being Cochon.

Really lost for words.

Sheila said...

But I just discovered you! And I have 2 gluten, dairy, egg AND soy free boys to feed! All I've made so far are your breadsticks and they were.... gone... in the car, in the lunchbox, in the bed (I kid you not, son1 eats from the moment he wakes til he's not awake anymore so this kind of tasty non sweet snackage is just what we need) I look forward to trying out the rest of your recipes and reading soon that the move have gone smoothly. Good luck with it! Sx

Athena In Trainers said...

Oh goodness gracious I didn't expect that huge news. I know a thing or two about moving and being the new family at school ... I really hope it all goes well and you settle in quickly.
Bye for now,
AthenaInTrainers (once was GoneBackSouth - NB: I still am south and feel more at home here now than I did up north. Just saying.)